Really bad ideas and Life Lessons….just from today

ImagePart One:

I had a horrible idea this morning at around 5 am. I thought about becoming a ‘Mommy-blogger.’

It seemed like a great idea at the time. I thought to myself (by the dawn’s early light)- “Hey Self, you like to blog/write/genuflect. Why don’t you see if you could do it on BabyCenter.com or AlphaMom.com? How many Mommy-Bloggers are there?”

Actually, what I said to myself is “How many Mommy-Bloggers can there be?

Here’s a tip from experience: ANY QUESTION like “How many/much/whatever could it/they be?” is the entrepreneurial equivalent of “Hey, hold my beer and watch this!” It might end well for a very few people, and many more will have interesting stories come out of it, but most people should have had better friends who tried to talk them out of whatever ‘it’ was. Just saying.

I think you see where I’m going with this. I thought it was a great idea at 5 am. I might have just been subconsciously trying to distract myself. So I checked- at 5:15 am- and it turns out there are a quadrillion Mommy-Bloggers. Turns out Mommy-Blogging is just what first-world women do at a certain point in their lives, like bangs or knitting. We try it and crash in a spectacular ball of flames (or a years worth of bad pictures). Then, we forget and try again about two years later. It never ends quite like you picture it will.

So the Mommy-Blogger market is saturated. Got it. I really hate being redundant, and while I could try to find a niche, it turns out that the ‘Slighty-snarky-white-chick-blog’ niche is ALSO completely overdone. Who knew?

Lesson learned. When I have ideas at 5 am, I should just roll over and ignore them. I’m sure that will work. Yes, I have a firm grasp of irony.

Image

Part Two:

So I realized partway through my day today that Life was tossing several boulder-sized lessons my way. I just wanted to stop and take stock. Cause, you know, when you don’t pay attention to Life, it has a way of biting you on the ass.

Here are MY lessons for today. May they do you much good:

1.) Your ability to use words is inversely proportional to your proximity to a picture of Channing Tatum. I don’t know why, but it is. He is Womankind’s Kryptonite.

2.) If you smell poop, check yourself and check your baby.  It’s somewhere, and you’re racing the clock to find it. Really, it should be an easy search.

3.) Just because Taco Bell takes debit cards is no reason to stop carrying cash. It WILL be important for you to have it, usually when it is least convenient.

I’m sure there are other, more altruistic-themed lessons that Life threw my way today. For some reason these stick out. May my wisdom light you way.

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2 thoughts on “Really bad ideas and Life Lessons….just from today

  1. This

    2.) If you smell poop, check yourself and check your baby. It’s somewhere, and you’re racing the clock to find it. Really, it should be an easy search.

    Should actually be this

    2.) If you smell poop, check yourself and check your baby. It’s somewhere, and you’re racing the clock to find it. Ideally, it should be an easy search.

    And also, you are tremendously funny, and almost always right. Except that ^ You know I’m right about that. And if you don’t know it yet, you will. Fair warning.

  2. Pingback: I want to be an author. Starting now. | That's What She Said

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